Could the person sitting next to you at the library be watching porn?

Mandatory condom use in adult films on the ballot this fall in LA County. Who wants to see condoms in their porn? And should it be mandatory between two consenting adults? More on this later.

Iran wants Facebook’s help with fighting porn. Good luck with that.

Today I’m going to delve into a favorite topic of mine…fetishes. The word alone invokes sexual desire and makes most peoples’ faces have an O reaction. Add fetish onto the end of any word in a conversation to see what I mean.

For example: I had the most amazing lunch with my coworker, it was so satisfying. However, now I need to head into the bathroom and rub one out…because I have a major sushi fetish. ;)

Being in the phone sex business, we obviously get a variety of calls from fetishists.

First let’s define these terms:

According to Wikipedia: Sexual Fetishism, or Erotic Fetishism, is defined as “the sexual arousal a person receives from a physical object, or from a specific situation. The object or situation of interest is called the fetish; the person who has a fetish for that object/situation is called a fetishist.”

Now on to the fun! Exploring some of the top fetishes out there…

Here’s a great article, with a list of ten top fetishes:

Top 10 Fetishes
1. Voyeurism and Exhibitionism

2. Golden Showers
3. Water
4. Braids, Ponytails, Pigtails
5. Fingernails and Lipstick
6. Feet and Hands
7. D&S (Domination and Submission)
8. Leather, Rubber, Vinyl, Latex
9. Body Piercings
10. Stomachs

OK, great foreplay but today I want something freakier for my main course.

8 Freakiest Fetishes
1. Woolies: obsessed about wool clothing

2. Squashing Fetish: obsessed about getting squashed by an XL woman
3. Robot Fetishism: obsessed about robots
4. Objectophilia: obsessed about objects
5. Looners: obsessed about balloons
6. Mucophilia: obsessed about sneezing
7. Pedal Pushing Fetish: obsessed about pedal gas pumping
8. Hands on the Hip Fetish: obsessed with this position

6 Depraved Sexual Fetishes that are older than you think
1. Sadomasochism
2. Zoophilia
3. Necrophilia
4. Foot Fetishism
5. Autoerotic Asphyxiation

6. Tentacle Rape

10 Bizarrely Hilarious Fetishes
1. Macrophilia: Women with giant vaginas
2. Spectrophilia: Supernatural lovers
3. Exophilia: Alien lovers
4. Flatulophilia: Fart fetishism
5. Agalmatophilia: Statue fetishism
6. Sploshing and Sitophilia: Food fetish
7. Hierophilia: Religious fetishism
8. Smoking Fetishism
9. Kleptolagnia: Stealing fetish
10. Trichophilia: Hair fetish

Strange Sex Fetishes and Practices
1. Balloon Fetishism (poppers and non poppers)
2. Hematolognia: Vampire Sex
3. Adult Baby Syndrome
4. Knismolagnia: Tickling Fetish
5. Flying in the Nude
6. Karezza: Prolonging or Denying Release (similiar to Tantra, but more of a control factor)
7. Sexual Surrogates
8. Sploshing (basically like a food fight, with yourself)
9. Agalmatophilia: Doll Fetish
10. Love Huts
11. Objectum Sexuality
12. Ursusagalmatophiliacs: Furries
13. Exophilia: Alien Sex
14. Trichophilia: Hair Fetish
15. Tantric Sex

20 Strange and Disturbing Sexual Fetishes
1. Symorophilia: Arousal caused by accidents or disasters
2. Dendrophilia: Sexual interest in trees
3. Frotteurism: Rubbing up against a non-consenting person
4. Enderacinism: Arousal caused by the thought of ripping out sexual organs
5. Mucophilia: Sexual pleasure related to mucas
6. Autonepiophilia: Sexual pleasure derived by dressing like an infant
7. Gerontophilia: Sexual preference for the elderly
8. Salirophilia: Fetish involving soiling others
9. Ursusagalmatophilia: Arousal caused by dressing like a furry animal
10. Aptemnophilia: Aroused by amputees
11. Formicrophilia: Arousal caused by insects bitting or crawling on body
12. Vorarephilia: Aroused by thought of eating or being eaten by sexual partner
13. Zoosadism: Sexual pleasure derived by inflicting pain on animals
14. Agalmatophilia: Statue or mannequin fetish
15. Mechanophilia: Sexual attraction to cars or machines
16. Avisodomy: Sex with a bird
17. Oculolinctus: Erotic pleasure via licking someone’s eyeball
18. Psychrophilia: Arousal contingent upon contact with cold objects
19. Hierophilia: Sexual attraction to religious objects
20. Catheterophilia: Sexual interest in catheter usage

So, there are a few repeats…but interesting to see what’s out there in the fetish world, right.
You’re not alone in your masturbatory fantasies!

Two of my personal favorite fetishes that surprisingly were not included in the above lists are:
Spanking: including erotic spanking, punishment, whipping, flogging, paddling
Bondage: mainly rope fetish, but also including handcuffs, scarves, ties, belts

The imagination is a wonderful thing, let the fantasies continue. Cheers to your pleasure…and mine. ;)

Soooooo…last night I was trying to sleep but finding it impossible, so I decided to do the next best thing- masturbate! Now, we all have our techniques, our toys, and our own styles. Since I get off hard a lot with my job, when it comes to MY OWN sexy alone time, I’m a bullet girl! It’s quick, easy, and right to the point. (I save the giant dildo for more special occasions that my nightly O!) So last night I got out my AWESOME bullet, whom I have named Clint. Clint has 5 different speeds/rhythms, all of which are good depending on how fast I want to cum.

So…I grabbed Clint, pressed him right up against my little clit, hit the button….and nothing! Not even a wiggle! Had I burned him out? Were his batteries suddenly completely dead? No…no this could not be! I have other toys…but I wanted Clint! Clint is, well, effortless. He doesn’t make a mess and since he’s external, doesn’t really need to be cleaned as much as other toys. He’s discreet, economical…and dead. I could almost feel a tear in my eye—I had been looking forward to our date all day, especially since it was my day off, so I didn’t have the usual work-related masturbation holding me over!

As I laid there frustrated and sad, a movie scene popped into my mind: Naomi Watts in Mulholland Drive, fingering herself like mad while also sobbing like a bitch. I don’t know if it is the masochist in me or what, but that scene turned me on, even though I get the impression it was SUPPOSED to creep us out! This got me thinking about other masturbation scenes in movies. Like Natalie Portman in Black Swan—where she looks over and her mother is asleep right on the chair! Now THAT ONE I do think was creepy…but still HOT. I mean, Natalie Portman could be taking a shit and look hot, right? That’s one girl I’d love to get crazy lesbo on! Anyway, that led to yet another scene burned indelibly into my mind: the masturbation scene of Jennifer Jason Leigh in Single White Female. (LOVE that movie!) Remember how Bridget Fonda’s character sees her by accident? JJL isn’t nearly as hot as Portman, though.

Then I tried to think of GUY masturbation scenes. Hate to say it, but I don’t really like those American Pie-type movies about horny teenagers. I prefer things a little more erotic. Dick and fart jokes are a bit too low-ball for me. So outside of those few that came to mind, I had a bit of trouble coming up with any GOOD male masturbation scenes. Finally I remembered an indie movie called “Nowhere”, where the bunny from Donnie Darko (no idea what his name is and I’m too lazy right now to look it up) jerks it in the shower while his mother (Beverly D’Angelo) beats on the bathroom door. Ok, now that WAS kind of hot. Oh! And speaking of Beverly D’Angelo…she was a lesbian ghost who masturbated through her clothes in The Sentinal! My mind just kept on connecting these masturbatory dots!

Next came Tommy Boy! David Spade jerking it window-side until Chris Farley walks in! Classic! And then he teased him all night, asking him if he’s favorite Rascal was Spanky! God I love that movie. (Stoner classic! Shhhhhh!)

Last but not least, the super pathetic and sad scene where Mark Walberg tries to whack it for money in Boogie Nights, but can’t get it up. Then a bunch of dudes kick the crap out of him.

All of these scenes converged in my mind into one, giant masturbation montage. And before I knew it, my index finger was manually stroking my little button, rubbing one out to the visuals of all of them doing the same. So I finally got mine…what about you?

What is YOUR favorite masturbation movie scene?

nice ass for phone sex

Oh boys…how I’ve missed writing you these last few days. Well, it’s because I’ve been working my sexy round ass off! You see, since I take such great pride in what I do, I’m always looking for ways to improve. My latest challenge has been getting even better at building the visual pictures for my clients. Sure, my moaning goes a long way, but my descriptions could be even better. Like I mentioned my sexy round ass…I could take that a lot further, couldn’t I? I could tell you that I’ve got an apple-bottom shape, with a low crack like you’d find in one of those old English or Roman paintings of a woman lounging naked on a bed. I could tell you that it is firm enough to bounce a quarter off of, and has the nicest rebound bounce when you spank it! I could tell you the size of my beloved booty is exaggerated by the fact that it tapers into a tiny little waist PERFECT for holding onto we you’ve got my flipped around in doggie-style. I could tell you that despite my overall petite figure, that I’m thicker in the thighs, offering the best cushion for the pushin’, as they say.
See what fun words can be? I could explain my breasts—instead of the usual boring old size (naturally large C, maybe small D cup) I could go on to tell you that my areolas are the most lovely terracotta-mixed-with-pink color. They are on the larger size, but the nipples themselves are tiny and cute, and perfect for sucking and nibbling…
Yes, I’m working on painting a picture worth a thousand words. I want to make sure your c*ck responds EXACTLY how I want it to: popping up at full attention. Because this body DESERVES a throbbing rod ready for it. See…what I do is an art, and I’ve got all the right tools.